It doesn’t matter whether you’re a he/him, she/her, or they/them, relationships can be hard.

Why? People are People. They are complex, interesting, frustrating, lovable, prickly, and puzzling.

If you want to make your relationship better, there’s one thing you might be doing that is making it harder and more frustrating and if you want to fix it you have to…

Stop Making Assumptions!

I’ve been married for almost 40 years and this is still one of the hardest things to quit doing. My wife may think I can read her mind, which can be frustrating, but when I think I can read her mind and know what she’s thinking or what her motives are I’m in big trouble.

The same goes for any relationship. You can’t read other people’s minds. Shoot, truth be told, you’re lucky if you even know what you’re thinking a lot of times.

How do you get out of this bad habit of making assumptions?

Start Asking Questions!

If you think someone is upset with you, don’t assume they are, ask them.

If you think your spouse or partner knows what you want to do for your birthday, don’t assume, ask them if they’d like to know.

It sounds so simple but we get so used to making up our own internal worlds where we know everyone’s motives and what they want and why they are behaving the way they are.

Don’t assume you know. Ask.

Do this one thing and watch your relationships improve.